| EAR
LESS.
In an extraordinary
art performance I will be attempting to pull a television along the road
for 6 kilometres with my ear, through the streets of Milan, Italy, (see
drawing). The television will be attached to my ear by a thin but unusually
strong piece of string. This amazing never seen before event will start
in South London, when I will travel by car from my home to Stanstead Airport,
boarding a flight to Venice, carrying the television in my arms on the
plane, with it at all times attached to my ear. I will stay overnight,
sleeping with the television, then the following day travel by train from
Venice to Milan, where the true performance/event will start to happen.
It will start when I lie down on the pavement outside of Milan central
train station and begin pulling the television along the road using only
my ear, scraping my back as I go, making my way through the centre of
Milan, to eventually arrive at the residence/offices of Silvio Berlusconi,
the Italian Prime Minister. This is because I have heard that Mr Berlusconi
was buying up lots of television companies and wondered if he wanted to
buy my recently established MMcGTV Company, (Mark McGowan TeleVision).
I am prepared to sell the company for 7,500 euros. A special television
is to be handed over as a goodwill gesture, hoping to prompt a deal with
the Italian Premier. I mean it is a win, win deal for Silvio, he gets
another great television company. Sure I get the big pay day with the
7,500 euros, so I suppose we will all profit from the deal, I just hope
my ear can cope with the amount of pressure that it takes to pull a 21
inch (53cm) television along the road, also I am a bit worried about scraping
my back on the pavement, but it is worth it I just hope Mr. Berlusconi
thinks so too. The event is to begin at 10 am on Wednesday 14th April
2004, starting outside Milan central train station. I have no idea how
long the journey could last, it could last one day or possibly a week,
I am not sure as I have not tried to pull a 21inch television with my
ear before, hopefully I can master a good technique, but you can not rush
these things or you could get hurt, like a sore ear.
Previous
performances include:
YOU TURKEY 2003 I walked backwards for 11 miles with a 27lb turkey strapped
onto my head, while shouting at fat people.
ROCKET 2003 an old lady was catapulted.
MONKEY NUT 2003 I pushed a monkey nut along the road with my nose for
7 miles.
SAUSAGE CHIPS AND BEANS 2003 I sat in a bath of beans with two chips stuck
up my nose and had 48 sausages strapped on to my head for two weeks. OCEAN
WAVE II 2003/4 an attempt to sail a shopping trolley 400 miles from London
to Glasgow in Scotland, but had to abandon the trip due to weather, rescheduling
for summer 2004.
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